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For me, I didn’t even work for it. People just assume that I know stuff. It’s so awkward, I mostly just sit with my friends and nod along and sometimes throw in something like ‘yeah sure’ like I know what they are talking about. Look up imposter syndrome. I’m not saying that you are the Nice You Can’t Buy Happiness But You Can Buy A Bow And That’s Pretty Close Shirt the same as me, but it is a possibility. Yeah and that one time you speak to someone for some reason you’re like: “Why did I say that? Did I mean it? Did I just pretend to mean it? What the fuck did I mean?” I don’t act clueless, I usually am. But even if I do know something, sometimes its easier to just let someone new explain it to me. Sometimes it’s a reassurance that I understand the subject matter. Sometimes I find out that they do something different and why they do it that way.

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There are times when I don’t know if I am lying to Nice You Can’t Buy Happiness But You Can Buy A Bow And That’s Pretty Close Shirt myself or others. Even my girlfriend and my parents have a different perception of who I am because I feel I have to be my best self in front of them, it is so exhausting and makes me wanna run away and start new. I feel it. I’m not an extrovert by rights, nor am I an introvert the way you’d think. I don’t even know how to do it. Like, I see this person out there talking hours and I can’t make a phone call longer than 20 sec or small talk with friends. I don’t even know how to do it. Like, I see this person out there talking hours and I can’t make a phone call longer than 20 sec or small talk with friends.

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However, I am very successful at Nice You Can’t Buy Happiness But You Can Buy A Bow And That’s Pretty Close Shirt work because I know that if I don’t put myself out there and act confident, I won’t advance. I’m more scared of being destitute than I am shy I guess. This extends to my relationships because I’m married (she asked me out though) and have a very tight-knit group of friends. There are certain things you just have to do. This is me. Even the wife asking me out part. One difference…I don’t have a single friend. Not one. This bothers me because I know it’s not normal, but between work and family, I really don’t have the time or energy to be the kind of friend I would want to be. I don’t know what parts are real and what parts are fake anymore and that worries me. I pretend I’m clueless a lot. It could be about work, or even just about something in life.

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