That takes away from it and makes it something they made. Not something I did. Agreed, but it’s not even about understanding what your partner would like/not like, or agree with their reasoning. She shouldn’t have to write an essay titled “Why I Want to Cute My Body Knows How Old I Am Shirt Put My Own Bike Back Together” to get him to do it. Your partner’s wishes should be respected. So many people complain that their partners won’t tell them what they want or expect them to read their minds; this guy should be grateful she was so specific. It reads like he thinks he knows better than she does what would make her happy.
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That’s it! That’s why this hurts so much – it’s not just that she doesn’t get the experience she was looking forward to. It’s that he thinks he knows what’s best SO HARD he not only disrespected her wishes but gets to make her feel guilty about not being grateful for him doing that. Not quite the same but I had an argument with my father on a family holiday and the next day he bought me an expensive necklace despite me saying I didn’t want it because it was too much. He ignored me explicitly and repeatedly stated wishes, and has it a pseudo proof that he made up for Cute My Body Knows How Old I Am Shirt the argument.
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None of that was at all about making me feel okay. Ignoring what someone wants is Cute My Body Knows How Old I Am Shirt not a nice surprise, it’s a massive display of disrespect and often also a form of manipulation. Thank you! I’m glad he’s my ex, too. I really struggled for years because he had me convinced that I was a fussy, unreasonable person. Now I’m in a relationship with someone who actually respects what I want, and it was eye-opening. When you can be in a healthy relationship you suddenly realize why you were so angry before. I never really get angry anymore. It’s great.
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